Why Butterflies?

My husband and I found out that we were expecting a baby girl on February 26th. Afterwards, we went shopping to buy our first outfit for Ella. My husband picked out a precious cream and peach onsie with a butterfly on it. A few weeks later we had a family event at our new home. Several of our family members brought gifts for Ella. All but two of the outfits we were given had butterflies on them. After giving birth to Ella, I noticed that there was a butterfly sculpture outside my window at the hospital. Come to find out that butterflies are the symbol for a lost child. Isn't it weird how the universe sends us signs? I was just telling my husband that I love butterflies because they remind me of my baby, but at the same time I think I hate them because I feel like the universe was trying to send me signs that I was going to lose my baby. Or, did I jinx my situation because I purchased items with butterflies on them. Today, because it is the one month anniversary of Ella's passing and Easter Sunday, we are going to visit the Butterfly Jungle at the San Diego Wild Animal Park. I hope I can feel Ella's presence today.