Sucky Cervix Turned Super Cervix (Hopefully)

Thank you so much for your supportive words yesterday. We arrived at the hospital at 6 am to find out the surgery was being pushed til' noon (which was later pushed again til' 1), so I enjoyed reading all of your comments. We were settled comfortably into a private birthing suite. While I blogged and channel surfed, my husband enjoyed a 3 hour nap, poor guy didn't go to bed the night before.

When we arrived at L&D, we were greeted by the nurse who assisted with Ella's delivery. The nurse who placed her in my arms and told me how beautiful she was. Since it was near shift change, another nurse shortly took over. I knew her too. I really enjoyed being around these women. They talked about Ella at length with me and expressed how joyful they were to see us again. I loved that they knew our story and understood that I was feeling ultra anxious (I had 2 ultrasounds and heard the hb on the Doppler 3 times- loved that). I really enjoyed the TLC and even teased that I wouldn't have minded staying there til' June.

When the OR finally opened up, my nurse literally sprinted me down before another Emergency C section popped up. The actual surgery part was quite possibly the worst experience of my life (however, I'd endure that everyday if it resulted in a baby). I even remarked that it was more difficult than delivering a dead baby. The anesthesiologist must have poked me six times before he realized I needed more numbing meds. The pain was excruciating and I was wailing. I dislike feeling numb very much. I hated my EPI with Ella and I hated this even more. Another comment I made was that I hate the numbness so much, I may attempt natural childbirth (should I be lucky enough to reach that point). Next, my legs were placed into these giant ropes suspended from the ceiling. It was quite humiliating. I'm so glad my husband declined my doctor's invite to come in the OR. I was awake the entire time and practically hyperventalating on the table. I loved that my OB came to assist the perinatologist with the surgery, but I was so glad when it was over.

It took a few more hours for the meds to wear off. After no food or drink for 18 hours, I was treated to a delicious hospital sandwich. Not quite the meal I had been dreaming of all day long. But, at that point I would have eaten cardboard.

Finally, at 7:30 pm I was sent home. Once again I was wheeled out of L&D listening to the cries of other babies being born. Wheeled out empty armed, a bit sad, but happy to at least have one in my belly. We were both so tired. The husband slept til' 2 today. I've been lying in bed trying to keep my fear and anxieties over every little twinge at bay.

I guess now we just wait with hope that this does the trick and this baby stays put until June.

**This entire post was typed out on my I.Pod. Hope there aren't too many mistakes. :)